I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Panties = found
Randomize
