i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
