just tell him i said nine months
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
