Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
