I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Blood and glitter go together right?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
