guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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