Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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