I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
