Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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