He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize