Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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