New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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