in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
