he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize