well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
