like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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