Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
