I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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