my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Nicole vs. Life
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
