I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize