finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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