i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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