butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
