i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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