im about as happy as oj after his trial
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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