i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Randomize
