How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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