I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
