Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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