gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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