Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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