Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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