On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
