We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
