This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
