You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
