It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize