I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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