What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
