I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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