The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
