i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
