Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
