hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
