I hate all girls vehemently.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
