I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize