i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i barfeds in our rink
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
