You really coming over, don't trick.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
