Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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