he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
