i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My ass is underappreciated
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
